So it was a day like any other day.
I was checking my facebook and I saw a status my sister had posted about finally being able to walk without crutches!
I got SO excited for her and proceeded to write on her facebook wall, "FINALLY YOU'RE NOT A GIMP! Now you have NO EXCUSE to not do the incline with me when I'm out there in September for Lauren's wedding!"
I made it to the word "excuse" before I realized something huge... and weird.
Tita's not going to be there.
When I go back to Colorado, Tita won't be there. She'll be away at college in California.
At that realization, I started to cry.
My crying turned to bawling. Like, literal, heart-wrenching sobs with tears streaming down my face.
Sitting on your bed, crying all by yourself can be weird sometimes, I'll be honest - so I was grateful when sweet husband came over to find out what in the world his emotional wife was crying about.
He actually LOVES it when I cry, he think's it's so vulnerable and he loves being able to comfort me when I'm a mess of tears. So I told him why I was crying - yes I thought it was a dumb reason - and he held me for a while until the sobs ceased.
Of course I blame the birth control, but I also can't help but blame the fact that... growing up sucks sometimes.
My baby sister is going to college.
WHAAAT?
This beautiful gal is finally going to COLLEGE???
That can't be the same baby sister who:
- at age 6 sneakily (word?) stuffed her pants with socks so that my mom's spanking wouldn't hurt... haha :)
- would wear the SAME DAMN YELLOW SMILEY FACE BEANIE (or "tooook" for you Canadian readers) EVERY SINGLE DAY for a solid 3 years of her life
- preferred oversized, comfy clothes over anything "trendy" (to this day, that is still the case.)
- has "THE THING."
- writes beautiful poems and songs in her room into the wee hours of the morning
- has a lame victory dance.
- used to put on as many unmatched pieces of clothing as she could.
- would sneak up on the roof with me and star-gaze (don't tell my parents.)
- loved Buddy more than all of us combined.
- would be my music blasting buddy for Orianthi - Kellie Pickler - & Taylor Swift.
- would steal my clothes. And jewelery. And everything. (little turd.)
- watched her team win the State Championship from the sidelines - cheering them on and being GENUINELY HAPPY for the girls despite her crappy circumstances.
My sister is one of the most amazing people I know.
She has a servant's heart - she's a loyal friend and a friend to every single person she meets. Literally. Every person that meets my sister always tells me, "Tita is just so... awesome." There's just something about her that makes other people she meets feel SO important.
I love that about her.
She's hilarious & HAPPY. She's naive sometimes and I love it. She's patient and honest and loyal. She is so GENUINE and so REAL - not some fake high school girl that hides behind pounds of makeup and lives off of talking crap about other people.
She is BEAUTIFUL and doesn't know it.
She's wise and loving with her friends.
She knows who she is and doesn't get caught up standing in front of a mirror for hours - what you see is what you get when it comes to Tita - so beautiful.She believes the best about people.
She loves Jesus and is GENUINE in her pursuit of Him.
She's an ABSOLUTELY incredible athlete and keeps a humble heart despite her success... seriously this girl is amazing.
She makes me so proud - I LOVE that I can call her my baby sister, and I tear up at the thought of her not being home next time I return to Colorado. :(
So... this is just a tribute to Tita.
The most incredible baby sister in the world.
I'm so thankful for her - so blessed.
And I don't mind a bit bragging about how incredible she is - because she doesn't get it as often as she deserves and BELIEVE ME she deserves it... every word.
Dear Tita,
You're amazing and everyone knows it. I love you. I'm proud of you. I love who you are as a person - so FUN and REAL and HAPPY and GENUINE. I love everything about you. I wish I had been a better sister to you - if I could go back in time I'd have you with me every step of the way :) But I'm so excited for the years we have to come... I love that you'll always be in my life.
I'm proud of you for your positive attitude despite the tough 4 months you've had. You've been an inspiration to me and to the people lucky enough to share these last 4 months with you. And now... you're going to freakin COLLEGE!!!
1) KNOW Jesus. Don't just know about Him. Don't just know some things He's said... KNOW Him. Intimately. KNOW His heart - KNOW how He loves people - KNOW what His reactions would be in certain situations - KNOW His opinion of people - KNOW His truth - KNOW His humility, His servant heart, His radical words, His necessary relationship with the Father. The world is going to flash intelligent arguments and the Christian church is going to try to counter them in every circumstance - but if you KNOW Jesus, you will KNOW how to respond and what He looks like in certain situations.
2) Fear not. Don't be afraid to try new things and make mistakes. Make wise choices about the things you try - but don't be afraid. Worse case scenario... you wind up pregnant and we have a little baby Tita running around. We'd still love you, promise. But you'd have plenty of regrets & if you could go back, you'd probably do things a little differently. ALWAYS THINK: is what I'm about to do going to affect my life to the point where if I could go back, I'd want to change it??
Live life with no secrets, and live life with NO REGRETS. You'll be SO happy you did. PLUS - and I can speak from experience - sex within marriage is just TOO wonderful and SO WORTH waiting for. So be wise - but don't hesitate to try new things. Dream big and fall big - we'll love you. You'll always have a family that adores you. But make wise decisions & pursue a righteous life in JESUS - full of love for people!
3) Be YOU. Don't become like every other college girl... please. Don't be worried about your outward appearance, don't compare yourself to the other "california beauties" around you - you are BEAUTIFUL because of your appearance, your smile, and especially your heart. WHO YOU ARE RIGHT NOW is so more than enough.
Don't get caught up with the trends, with clothes, with who's the prettiest or the skinniest or the coolest. You are ALL those things and more and who you are is so perfectly wonderful - don't change a THING.
9) Give 100% in everything you do. So corny - but so vital. Especially as a college athlete. You're not playing as a goalie for Master's College - you're playing for someone bigger than that. Don't give 50% - give 100% every day. Every time. In relationships too - be the friend that is dependable, loyal, fun, and in it for the long haul. It'll make you a better person and it'll shine a light, promise.
Dream big dreams Tita - and above all else,
love people & love Jesus... and love em' big.
Of course, as your big, WISE sister I have to give you advice as you leave the Colorado Nest & settle in California... so here's my advice. The best I got. I hope you take away something from it.
1) KNOW Jesus. Don't just know about Him. Don't just know some things He's said... KNOW Him. Intimately. KNOW His heart - KNOW how He loves people - KNOW what His reactions would be in certain situations - KNOW His opinion of people - KNOW His truth - KNOW His humility, His servant heart, His radical words, His necessary relationship with the Father. The world is going to flash intelligent arguments and the Christian church is going to try to counter them in every circumstance - but if you KNOW Jesus, you will KNOW how to respond and what He looks like in certain situations.
He loves and He loves extravagantly... be like Him.
2) Fear not. Don't be afraid to try new things and make mistakes. Make wise choices about the things you try - but don't be afraid. Worse case scenario... you wind up pregnant and we have a little baby Tita running around. We'd still love you, promise. But you'd have plenty of regrets & if you could go back, you'd probably do things a little differently. ALWAYS THINK: is what I'm about to do going to affect my life to the point where if I could go back, I'd want to change it??
Live life with no secrets, and live life with NO REGRETS. You'll be SO happy you did. PLUS - and I can speak from experience - sex within marriage is just TOO wonderful and SO WORTH waiting for. So be wise - but don't hesitate to try new things. Dream big and fall big - we'll love you. You'll always have a family that adores you. But make wise decisions & pursue a righteous life in JESUS - full of love for people!
3) Be YOU. Don't become like every other college girl... please. Don't be worried about your outward appearance, don't compare yourself to the other "california beauties" around you - you are BEAUTIFUL because of your appearance, your smile, and especially your heart. WHO YOU ARE RIGHT NOW is so more than enough.
Don't get caught up with the trends, with clothes, with who's the prettiest or the skinniest or the coolest. You are ALL those things and more and who you are is so perfectly wonderful - don't change a THING.
4) Learn everything. Literally. Knowledge is power. The more you know about life, relationships, education, and especially JESUS - the stronger you will be as a person and as a follower of Jesus. Be a sponge - realize that school is an opportunity to LEARN ABOUT EVERYTHING and soak it all up. The more you know - the more influential you will be.
5) Guard your heart. What's in your heart comes out in your words and actions. If you want to love people, let Christ's love be IN YOU. I know it's so cliche but it's really hard to do. Don't guard your heart from love - guard your heart TO love. Don't fill your mind with things that don't matter - don't let your heart be worried about things that are out of your control. Guard it against the world and keep it consecrated to Jesus.
6) TRUST Jesus. Trust Him with everything - even the little things. Include Him in every area of your life. He's there and He loves you and you don't have to worry about a THING because HE said so. Rest in that. Trust Him with your relationships, your career, your healing process with your knee, your homework, everything. Your college experience will improve significantly the sooner you realize that He holds it all together anyways.
7) Chase wisdom. DO it. Look for wisdom and practice wisdom in every situation. Ask your teachers, ask your coaches, ask your friends. Don't just be impulsive - be patient and chase after wisdom for your decisions. And if I were you - I really would ask mom & dad. Seriously. We're lucky to have parents that are as wise and care about us as much as they do. Don't take that for granted, USE OUR PARENTS. Be wise and chase wisdom all the time.
8) Eat Healthy. I know this is a lame one, but seriously. The older I've gotten the more and more I've realized HOW FREAKISHLY IMPORTANT this is. Take care of your body. Stay away from sugar, from flour, from carbs. Eat veggies & fruits & DRINK TONS OF WATER. Your healthy, UN-DIABETIC, in-shape 50 year old body will thank me for this one down the road... but if you ignore me, you're FAT, DIABETIC, UGLY body will regret it every day. Trust me. Eat healthy & eat small portions & love your body - it's not vain - IT'S IMPORTANT.
9) Give 100% in everything you do. So corny - but so vital. Especially as a college athlete. You're not playing as a goalie for Master's College - you're playing for someone bigger than that. Don't give 50% - give 100% every day. Every time. In relationships too - be the friend that is dependable, loyal, fun, and in it for the long haul. It'll make you a better person and it'll shine a light, promise.
10) HAVE FUN. Laugh a lot. Make memories. Play jokes. Bake cookies & make weird smoothies. Go to fro-yo bars & pile on the mocchi for me. Eat chocolate even if you don't like it. Take TONS of pictures - more funny ones than serious ones. Go to the ocean as often as possible, it gives you good perspective and reminds you how small you really are. Don't take yourself too seriously. Love people. Go running, just because you can. Learn a lot. Find friends that will be there forever. Stay up late watching movies. Don't do drugs - dream bigger than drugs. Don't skip classes & get behind... that just equals more stress every time. Don't drink before you turn 21 - respect your authorities. BUT when you turn 21 - drink Budlight Lime & Woodchuck... they're by far the BEST. Set a goal & do it. If you get in a car with someone who is drinking and driving and still survive... I'm gonna kill you anyways. That's stupid and unnecessary and you'll regret it. When you're alone in your room, find some trashy rap song and turn it way up and dance your heart out - seriously, I've tried it when I was alone in my house and it's so freakin fun. ALWAYS encourage people - if you think someone looks beautiful, tell them. Don't be stingy with your words, your words might make someone's day a lot better. Blast Orianthi, Taylor, & Kellie whenever you can & think of me. :)
Don't forget to talk to your family at least once a week and always remember - we're only a few hours away.
Munchy - you make me happy. Thanks for making all of us so proud - seriously you have. I'm crying right now thinking about how sad I'll be when I come back to Colorado and you won't be there. But I'm SO excited for you and your future. I dont' care where you go or what you accomplish in life - you'll always be my fun, crazy baby sister who needs to mail me back that bathing suit you stole from me.... turd. :)
Dream big dreams Tita - and above all else,
love people & love Jesus... and love em' big.
I love you poop head.
Now go knock em' dead. :)
