The Happiest Chapter :::

How do you say goodbye? How do you close a chapter in your life? How do you mourn that?

If I'm honest, I'm still not quire sure I've figured it out.

On August 1st, we were notified of our next assignment. A shocking, unexpected gift. One that triggered a flood of emotions, and just like that we were given a 6 week notice to pack up everything that had become our life in New Jersey and go.

6 weeks to bid farewell to the state and community we've loved for 5.5 years.
6 weeks to schedule the movers, the Dr appointments, the crazy last minute details.
6 weeks to make our rounds of painful goodbye's.
6 weeks to prepare to leave the people we've really come to love as family.

How do you feel when you have 6 weeks to do all that hard stuff?

For me, that feeling has been described in 1 four letter word: N U M B.

I've been numb! I've been in crazy, busy stressed mode and haven't really processed all that has taken place, all that has ended. The beauty of this last New Jersey chapter. The grace that covered it, the joy that bloomed in it, the love that grew and held steadfast during it.

Which I suppose is why we're here, after all. :) To process. To feel again. To awaken the numb and dive into remembrance, reflection, honor and beauty again.

I say this with tears in my eyes, as I allow myself to feel the weight of the grace that was hidden behind these words:

I loved New Jersey.

Gosh, I loved New Jersey.  *tears*
Who says that, right? ;)

Every page of this New Jersey Chapter that God has written for us was so beautiful. And I feel so incredibly blessed to say that very little of it had to do with location (although, I'll be the first to admit that South Jersey is stunningly beautiful!)
The Air Force has proven to us over and over the truth behind the phrase, "the people make the place." For our Stainback story, those words couldn't be truer. Our people here, made this place for us.

Being in the military most likely means being away from family. For our entire marriage, Billy and I have flown solo in regards to family. They were always a plane ride away, too far of a drive and definitely further than we would've chosen for ourselves.
So, when the next assignment comes up and that distance happens, you're given a choice: Lay low and wait for the assignment to be over, avoiding connections with friends because you're just going to say goodbye anyways... or dive in, connect, love and plug into the people (military or civilian) around you!

If you know us at all........ you know which one we'd chose every day of the week. ;) We're diving in!

And holy guacamole, am I glad we did.

5.5 years ago, (1,922 days to be exact, but who's counting...) :) we were two crazy kids who had just finished a cross-country roadtrip from Texas to GA to FL to NC to MD to NJ and in June 2012,  we crossed a big ol' bridge and finally saw the sign "Welcome to New Jersey!" --- we were finally "home sweet home!" Our dreams were coming true and we didn't even know the half of it.

Almost immediately, we started meeting incredible people we were lucky enough to call neighbors! The first year was rich with military friendships as we lived on base. Taylor, Mary, Beth, Kimberly, Aaron, Amber, Doug, just to name a few. These kind people were all Jesus lovers - who were amazing friends as we still were transitioning into our new lives in this new random state. He knew what we needed in that season and we felt blessed beyond measure!

Bill was learning to fly his dream plane, I was making our house feel like a home and maneuvering all things wifey... it was a sweet season.

Fast forward a year... we got the crazy idea to save some money and move off base. Most of our military friends had already moved away, and we felt like God was totally leading us in this direction... little did we know what He had in store!

After a few weeks of church hunting (barf), we found ourselves wanting to stay at Fellowship Alliance Chapel and at first, we made some amazing friends on the worship team, but it was only when we moved off base that most of our friendships deepened and grew and changed our whole New Jersey experience for the better.

God is so good - He knew one thing we desperately ached for and wanted in coming to NJ was a surrounding of community - He answered in a beautiful way and brought us, our people.

... and this really isn't even half of them!!!

I wish I could write a blog post for each individual person that has meant so so so much to us but it still wouldn't be enough. Each of you made this place feel like home, and each contributed to our happy chapter more than you would ever realize...

So, Dear Friends...

We have grown in our love for Jesus and for others through your kindness, encouragement, example, inspiration, wisdom, friendship and love. Walking through the dramatic shifting seasons in your lives has been an absolute honor. You have shown us truly what sacrificial love is by opening up your home, your hearts and your lives and making us a part of it. Your friendship is worth fighting for, cherishing and keeping forever.

You opened your home to us year after year and loved us so well. You saw things in us that we didn't see, called out the truth and gave us the courage to walk in it. You have taught us so much, walked with us through heartache, rejoiced with us when we rejoiced and cried when we cried.

From dropping off Chick-fil-a breakfast on my doorstep after a sleepless night alone with a screaming baby, to answering 103849 million questions about pregnancy, baby life, etc - you always lent a listening ear, word of wisdom, and encouraging heart... to emailing a lonely guy in a desert to remind him he is missed, loved and wanted. Your friendship is priceless.

You have been with us in some of our most vulnerable and difficult times and lavished love on us. You loved our daughter as your own. You bent over backwards to accommodate our every need, even in the middle of the night - and we are speechless and blessed by that, and by who you are. 

You made us laugh, made us dream again and awakened our hearts to want more and more of Jesus. Your vulnerability and optimism and passion for life inspired us through and through. You are people worth walking through life with. Your friendship is worth it's weight in gold. 

You were steady, consistent, loyal, true. You pursued and poured your heart open to us. You give and give and love and love. You are a favorite breakfast date and a beautiful person with a beautiful heart. You are beautifully kind, inspirational and a person I will miss so very much in EVERY way.

You made me laugh and made me cry (in a good way). Having you by my side made me feel stronger, better, more confident and more ready to worship with everything I had. You made me want to worship Jesus better and your transparency and love is something I will never forget. 

How can I even put into words what you have meant to us. Our adopted parents who just pretended to be bosses, but truly loved us as your own. I traveled the country with you, grew as a person with you, grew in my love for ministry with you, and was inspired to be a better Proverbs 31 wife with you. You will always be irreplaceable to us. 

Your presence and friendship came at an incredibly critical, overwhelming and difficult time in my life... Mommyhood! We cried, laughed, shared, hoped and loved together around a table. I felt so comfortable, so at home, so encouraged, and so OK with just being me... where I was at... even if it wasn't the prettiest. I'm so thankful for our season together and for God placing us all together!

Whether it was being some of the first people I trusted enough to be willing to leave my child to, or people who randomly welcomed us into their home on any given weekend, you will always have a special place in our hearts and made our time in NJ so beautiful and sweet. I admire and am so grateful for your hospitality, your open door policy, your love for people. 

From double dates to new seasons of life and change, being a tiny part of your journey has been the greatest gift. I will never forget Bill coming home feeling so happy and encouraged by your accountability meetings. I'm so glad we got to share life together. 

From the days at the Academy to days in a new state, talking you off a ledge to leave the old and weary behind and dive into your new beautiful life. :) Our history together, our long-term friendships and the fact that it's a small Air Force makes me so happy to know our time together is never really over!

And although in many ways we know what distance (and crappy timing) has looked like, we've chosen to love and enjoy the short days we have together. And we are so very thankful for that!

And truly, there are so, SO many more I could add... which is crazy and beautiful...

But friends, here we are. 

We loved, made memories, cried tears of laughter, vacationed together and debated politics and church stuff together, dreamed out loud together, walked through new seasons of life together, cried together, broke bread together, met weekly together, grew together, literally MOVED each of us multiple times together, worshiped together, celebrated life together, became parents together, fell in love more with Jesus together. 

It's been the HAPPIEST CHAPTER for us. 

So, how do you say goodbye?
Well first of all, you don't. You say thank you. You say I love you. You say I'll see you again one day because each of you is just too important to us to not. You say this isn't the end, it's a pause in light of eternity. You say we will truly miss EACH and EVERY one of you more than you could ever know.

We love you, dear friends. 
Thank you for making our New Jersey Chapter the "Happiest Chapter."
Jesus loved us so much in this season, and He did it through each of you.
And us Stainbacks are forever grateful and forever changed because of it.